Unapologetically Finding Myself Again

Last year, I felt like I mentally beat myself up.

Alot.

My son was in the ICU with a critical illness, I lost my job while he was in the hospital, my car’s engine died while we were on a family road trip, and everything that could go wrong was going wrong.

I fell into a state of depression.

Life started life-ing and I blamed myself for all of it.

And every time I tried to pick myself up to start again, anxiety and guilt reared its ugly head.

I couldn’t even show up for myself. I didn’t want to be seen.

So, I took a mental health break. I realized that I’ve been through a lot more than I’ve let myself absorb over the past few months. I found a therapist and started giving myself the grace of looking at my past in a different light. I stopped blaming myself for things that I couldn’t control. But most importantly, I now feel empowered about finding myself again.

Here’s what I’ve learned on my break:

After experiencing hardship or going through a difficult period, it can be hard to start over and find your footing. But don’t let that stop you from taking the steps necessary to reconnect with who you were before the setback. Unapologetically finding yourself again is a process of self-discovery, self-love, and acceptance.

• Be patient and gentle with yourself. Try to be kind to yourself and do things that make you feel empowered, motivated, and inspired.
• Spend time alone. Take time to be alone with your thoughts and feelings by journaling, or simply taking a walk in nature. This isolation period and healing process is sacred. Use this hiatus to reflect on who you are, how you feel, and what’s important to you.
• Surround yourself with positive people. If and when you’re ready to be in close proximity to others, make sure they are positive people. Call a friend or mentor who inspires you and who you admire.
• Try new things and step outside of your comfort zone. This could be trying a new hobby or traveling to a new place to learn something new about yourself.
• Practice self-love and self-compassion. Treat yourself with kindness, and avoid self-judgment and self-criticism. Remember that it’s okay to make mistakes and that they don’t define you.

When a seed is planted, it has to be nurtured to grow. As it grows, it might need to be uprooted and replanted again but – it will still grow. 

So, start over as many times as you need to in order to grow.

Starting over isn’t an admission of failure, it’s an opportunity to create the life you truly deserve.

Embrace the journey and watch yourself bloom.