Categories
Mental Health Wellness

Self-Care is Not a Luxury

The world has changed so much in the last year. A year ago today, schools were going on lockdown, people were losing jobs, and our mental health either suffered or thrived. Some of us have had to learn how to survive in isolation, how to maintain our homes, and basically how to live again. As we continue to deal with the uncertainty of the times, don’t forget to practice self-care. I know, I know… you think your self-care options are limited and you just don’t have time.

But self-care is not a luxury, sis. It is a MUST.

If things like having a spa party with the girls or that fancy trip isn’t an option for you right now, I’m here to say that there are always options for self-care. And it doesn’t have to include luxury spa sessions and a flight to Bora Bora. Although, that sounds amazing right now.

Don’t get me wrong, sis – before the pandemic, my definition of self-care was laying in bed and shopping on Amazon. You know, just to see what kind of lightning deal I can get in the next two days. But lately, getting fast shipping is hit or miss, and I’m trying to stop stalking my postal worker for my packages. (Like… Seriously, where is it, Frank?)

All jokes aside; Practicing self-care during this time, while we are still trying to find a new normal, is the best thing you can do for yourself. Life has a way of just knocking us off balance and disrupting our systems. So, if you’re not listening to your mind & body cues to step back you’re doing yourself a disservice. Make a commitment to practice self-care this year, and create a daily ritual for your mental health. A few simple things that can help on your self-care journey are:

  • Wake up earlier so you have time for YOU – exercise, dance, whatever.
  • Write or doodle about things you’re grateful for.
  • Put some headphones on and listen to some soothing music.
  • Spend a little extra time unapologetically doing nothing.
  • Find a quiet place to reflect and meditate before you end your day.

It’s easy for us to forget to take care of ourselves in our busiest moments. But self-care is simply asking ourselves what we need and honestly just following through. It’s about building a deeper connection with yourself and remembering to make ourselves a priority. Recently, I’ve committed to using tools like the Shine app to help me put my mental health first this year.

The Shine app is a self-care app founded by two women of color on a mission to make taking care of your mental health easier, more representative, and more accessible. The app helps you create a daily self-care ritual with meditations, reflection and journaling, and community discussions.

Be sure to use my affiliate link to access to get 40% off your first year of Shine Premium and access over 1,000 meditations in the Shine App: https://www.theshineapp.com/promo/influencer-chantelle?utm_source=Influencer&utm_medium=chantelle&utm_campaign=Feb_2021

And let me know below if you need an accountability partner, I’d love to help.

Categories
Lifestyle Mom Life

My View on Raising Teenagers & Encouraging Self-Love

I received a free copy of The Self-Love Revolution: Radical Body Positivity for Girls of Color in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.

If someone would have told me that I’d be the mother of two beautiful teenagers back in the day, I wouldn’t believe them. I swore that I wasn’t going to be a mom when I was a kid. I didn’t see myself as a mother. But here I am, four kids later, loving this journey called motherhood.

It hasn’t always been easy raising teenaged girls, though. The unrealistic expectations and pressures they feel are more than I could have imagined at their ages. Social media plays such a big role in their lives when it comes to what they should look like, what they should wear, and what dances they should know how to do, etc. It’s sometimes hard for me to give advice on things that I may or may not relate to. But as their mother, I’ve had to make it my commitment to encourage them to love themselves despite it all.

I recently read Virgie Tovar’s, The Self-Love Revolution: Radical Body Positivity for Girls of Color with my daughters. Honestly, this book couldn’t have came into our lives at a more perfect time. It felt like my daughters had an extra Auntie speaking to them through this book. Tovar offers an unapologetic guide to help you question popular culture and cultivate radical body positivity. I loved the journal prompts because I think they can help girls of color show up as their best selves. With the extra free time we’ve had at home due to this pandemic, I’ve been using those journal prompts in the book to start thought-provoking discussions with my girls. Tovar does a great job of giving practical advice and tools for parents, like myself, to help encourage self-love.

“Self-love is about recognizing and accepting that you are precious and valuable – unconditionally – and creating a life that honors that truth.”

As a teenager, I struggled with self-love myself. According to the idea of “sexy” in our culture – my butt wasn’t big enough, my skin wasn’t light enough, my hair wasn’t long enough, etc. Don’t get me wrong – I considered myself a confident person, but as Tovar says, “you deserve more than that.”

I lacked self-love.

Now I’m raising two teenagers with totally different outlooks on life but similar struggles. My 14-year-old dislikes that she is tall and slim, while my 16-year-old dislikes that she is short and wants to be slimmer. Tovar’s book helped us understand the ways that negative body image manifests in people of color. It’s time to change that.

I shared The Self-Love Revolution with my daughters because it is a powerful reminder for them to reflect on their perception and definition of self-love as they transition to adulthood. At this point in their life, I felt that a guide like this is necessary to build long-lasting body positivity.

I want them to always know that it’s okay to be exactly who you are. Because that is who you’re meant to be.

I encourage you to share The Self-Love Revolution with the young women in your life too, and help raise a powerful generation of confident young women.

How do you plan on encouraging self-love to your daughter as she grows? 

Categories
Mom Life

6 Healthy Hacks for a Busy Working Mom

Every single day is a balancing act for you; maintaining a busy household, looking after your kids, growing a business and taking care of your health are all major items on your agenda. You can’t afford to push any of these things to the side, so you need to learn to keep everything ticking along seamlessly. Everyone knows that raising children is time consuming enough, let alone working on the other areas of your life. Consider the following six healthy hacks for a busy working mom and you will soon feel much more energized and confident when it comes to balancing it all. 

6 Healthy Hacks for a Busy Working Mom

1. Simple Soul Food

Eating well is a vital part of balancing a healthy routine. If you neglect your health, every other aspect of your life is going to suffer. Make sure you prioritize simple soul food every day without fail; this authentic cuban picadillo recipe is the perfect way to nourish your body as a busy mom. Cooking healthy meals from scratch doesn’t need to be time consuming, you can make batch meals and freeze them for a later date.

2. Get Organized Ahead of Time

Don’t leave your organizational ideas until the last minute; this will definitely stress you out and bring chaos to your household. Getting organized is all about creating healthy habits that work for you, whether that’s a calming bedtime routine or an energizing morning ritual.

3. Keep Your Family Schedule Up to Date

Knowing where all of your kids need to be at any given time is so important. Keeping your family schedule up to date will save time and unnecessary stress. The most effective way to do this is to keep a calendar in your kitchen with all of their latest appointments and activities so you never forget a thing.

6 Healthy Hacks for a Busy Working Mom

4. Don’t Forget Date Night

Time alone with your significant other is so important, so make sure you don’t forget date night. Even if you only manage it for once a month, you will definitely see the difference in your mood and energy levels if you make time for the person you love.

5. Manage Your Work Time

When you work from home and have children to look after, everything can seem a little overwhelming and hectic. Separate your work tasks into small, digestible chunks so that you don’t feel overwhelmed with your workload every day. Being able to prioritize will be a life saver when it comes to getting your business tasks done.

6. Be Smart With Self Care

Healthy food is a huge part of staying healthy and so it self care. If you don’t allow yourself time alone from time to time you are going to be zapped of energy pretty quickly. Schedule important appointments with yourself and make sure you stick to them!

Hopefully, these six healthy hacks will help you to maintain your energy levels as a busy working mom so that you can stay energized no matter what life throws your way.

6 Healthy Hacks for a Busy Working Mom
Categories
Allergies Mom Life

Raising Children with Severe Food Allergies

Being a mom of two preschoolers definitely keeps you on your toes (it’ll be fun, they said). But being a mom of two preschoolers who are picky eaters with severe food allergies is, at times, brain wrecking!

My son, Jovani, is 5 years old and he is allergic to several things including

  • dairy (his worst allergy),
  • wheat,
  • eggs,
  • shellfish,
  • and peanuts.

My daughter, Milan, is 3 years old and she is allergic to

  • peanuts (her worst allergy),
  • soy,
  • eggs,
  • and wheat.

Yes, I know – that’s a lot of allergies. It’s also a lot of label reading and separate food prepping.

And trust me – if I had a dollar for every time someone said to me, “Wow! They’re allergic to everything. So, what do you feed them?!” … I’d be rich.

After doing this for the last five years with my little ones, it has gotten so much easier figuring out what they can and cannot eat. For the most part, cooking fresh is always the safest way to go.

My biggest worry is sending them out into the world with their food allergies and the people around them not helping them fast enough.

I’ve never felt so much fear and hopelessness in my life until the day I had to use the EpiPen Jr. on my son. We were packing up our house to move across the country to PCS to a new military installation and his personal cup was already packed. So, he grabbed his sister’s cup that was filled with regular cow’s milk and drank the WHOLE thing.

Raising children with severe food allergies; Jovani eating his homemade pizza with Daiya vegan cheese & bread slices instead of pizza dough
Jovani eating his homemade “pizza” with Daiya vegan cheese & bread slices instead of pizza dough

His skin broke into hives, his face was swelling, and he had trouble breathing. I panicked and started freaking out. My first thought was to rush to the emergency room, but we kept an EpiPen in the car and my husband told me to use it first.

We had to rush him to the emergency room immediately after; where I was told he was going into anaphylactic shock (if not treated immediately, can result to respiratory arrest, cardiac arrest and death). They gave him another shot of epinephrine and when the symptoms came back again, he had to be airlifted to the closest children’s hospital. My then 3 year old son grabbed my hand and said, “Mommy, I don’t want to die.” I cried so much that night. I wouldn’t wish that feeling on anyone.

 

My Tips for Raising Children With Severe Food Allergies

  1. Educate yourself. Learn about identifying the symptoms. Learn about food alternatives. Searching the grocery isles after the first diagnosis will seem very overwhelming, but it will get easier. There are plenty of websites with great information and resources like keychains and stickers for your child with their allergies listed and printable lists of alternatives. A few websites that I visited during our journey are the Food Allergy Research & Education® (FARE) website, the Kids With Food Allergies website, and blogs like
  2. Educate everyone who has to be around your child. Believe it or not, I have had a daycare worker give my son a full cheese stick because she thought dairy only meant milk. That was another trip to the ER and another cancelled daycare contract. Make sure everyone who babysits or cares for your children knows what your child is allergic to and alternatives to give them. Don’t assume that everyone knows or will be as careful about labels as you are.
  3. Use allergy-friendly products. I LOVEEEE finding new brands that sell allergy-friendly products.  My favorite allergy-friendly brands are Enjoy Life Foods (my kids love their cookies and chocolate bars) and Ian’s Natural Foods (they have chicken nuggets, alpha-tots, pizza, and more). We also love Van’s Foods. Gluten free, dairy free, and egg free waffles? Yes please! Although my baby girl can’t eat their waffles because of the soy, my son loves them.
  4. Explain it to your little one. After we had that big scare and my son was air lifted to another hospital, he kept asking what did he do wrong. We had to explain to him that he accidentally drank the “bad milk” and showed him pictures of all that he’s allergic to. Now whenever he sees anyone with something that him or his sister can’t have, he’s able to say “No, thank you. We’re allergic to that.” It will be hard for them to see their friends with cupcakes and ice cream, but they’ll learn that those things aren’t safe for them eventually.
  5. Keep hope alive. If you’re one of the lucky parents like me whose children were diagnosed with their food allergies as a baby, there is a possibility that your little one could outgrow some of their allergies. I try to get my little ones retested every year and so far, my son is no longer as allergic to wheat as he was as a baby. To be on the safe side, though, I still give him gluten free products since his sister can’t have it.

Raising children in this modern society is tough as it is, and adding the worry of your children’s severe food allergies can be scary… But it doesn’t have to be. There are plenty of parents on this journey just like us. Find an online community or local group that encourages you and shares food allergy tips. Focus on what your child CAN have rather than what they can’t have, and be the best parent you can be.