According to Elle magazine columnist, E.J. Dickson, a Mom Bod is “essentially code for a frumpy, asexual woman who has, to borrow a charming colloquialism that is almost exclusively applied to women, […] let herself go.“
When all of the excitement & celebration after labor subsides, a lot of us mamas are usually wondering – “Okay, when is my pre-pregnancy body coming back?” Trust me, I’ve been there (x4).
So, what happens when our body doesn’t automatically “snapback” to pre-pregancy size?
The praise towards women who bounce back to our size before getting pregnant is kinda obnoxious. It makes a lot of women feel bad about themselves because the transformation isn’t as fast for them. There’s this idea that because our bodies aren’t picture perfect, that means we’ve “let ourselves go.”
But you just made a whole human, Mama!
The emphasis should be snapping back to our best selves – mentally, physically, emotionally. Motherhood is beautiful. and beauty is about being comfortable in your own skin. It’s about knowing and accepting who you are & that includes your new MomBod.
Don’t let society tell you anything different.
If no one has told you today – You got this mama. You’re amazing. And your butt looks good.
The world has changed so much in the last year. A year ago today, schools were going on lockdown, people were losing jobs, and our mental health either suffered or thrived. Some of us have had to learn how to survive in isolation, how to maintain our homes, and basically how to live again. As we continue to deal with the uncertainty of the times, don’t forget to practice self-care. I know, I know… you think your self-care options are limited and you just don’t have time.
But self-care is not a luxury, sis. It is a MUST.
If things like having a spa party with the girls or that fancy trip isn’t an option for you right now, I’m here to say that there are always options for self-care. And it doesn’t have to include luxury spa sessions and a flight to Bora Bora. Although, that sounds amazing right now.
Don’t get me wrong, sis – before the pandemic, my definition of self-care was laying in bed and shopping on Amazon. You know, just to see what kind of lightning deal I can get in the next two days. But lately, getting fast shipping is hit or miss, and I’m trying to stop stalking my postal worker for my packages. (Like… Seriously, where is it, Frank?)
All jokes aside; Practicing self-care during this time, while we are still trying to find a new normal, is the best thing you can do for yourself. Life has a way of just knocking us off balance and disrupting our systems. So, if you’re not listening to your mind & body cues to step back you’re doing yourself a disservice. Make a commitment to practice self-care this year, and create a daily ritual for your mental health. A few simple things that can help on your self-care journey are:
Wake up earlier so you have time for YOU – exercise, dance, whatever.
Write or doodle about things you’re grateful for.
Put some headphones on and listen to some soothing music.
Spend a little extra time unapologetically doing nothing.
Find a quiet place to reflect and meditate before you end your day.
It’s easy for us to forget to take care of ourselves in our busiest moments. But self-care is simply asking ourselves what we need and honestly just following through. It’s about building a deeper connection with yourself and remembering to make ourselves a priority. Recently, I’ve committed to using tools like the Shine app to help me put my mental health first this year.
The Shine app is a self-care app founded by two women of color on a mission to make taking care of your mental health easier, more representative, and more accessible. The app helps you create a daily self-care ritual with meditations, reflection and journaling, and community discussions.
The day that I decided to work from home on my business full-time was a game-changer for me. Thanks to technology, I was able to schedule virtual conferences with my clients, I learned how to automate my communication, and my commute to work was nonexistent. Yaaas, right? Unfortunately, I still felt like I had to do ALL the things. I struggled with finding that work-life balance that I needed and I didn’t feel happy. Some of the biggest challenges I faced were staying focused and organized, but most importantly, I wasn’t making my mental health a priority.
As a Mom, we’re busy by necessity and we have to wear many hats. For others, it comes naturally. But I know how it gets when our brains won’t mentally clock out because we work from home. I especially, found it hard to detach from my workload because I run my own business. Regardless, getting organized, focused & motivated are key to staying sane while working from home. No one is perfect at this, and no one has the perfect formula… not even Beyonce!
Here are some tips that have helped me.
Establish a Routine
Having a routine helps to keep you grounded. It’s a good idea to set your alarm for the same time each weekday morning and head to your computer or home office at a scheduled time as if you’re leaving for work. Trying to scramble and figure out your work hours each day hampers your productivity.
Wake up and get dressed for the day. I know, I know – working from home sounds like freedom and sweatpants all day. But we have to prepare our minds to get ready for work, not to Disney+ and chill. This will also increase your productivity and get you in the right headspace.
Learn to Say NO
One of the quickest ways to lose your sense of order and become disorganized is to take on too much. Especially if you’re a freelancer or run your own business – you have to use discernment. If you are a “yes” person, you may ultimately disappoint your clients because you promised more than you can deliver. So, BE REALISTIC about the hours you can devote to working each week and learn to say “no” when you have to. Don’t let the Superwoman syndrome force you to believe that you have to say yes to everything and everyone.
Make Room for Your Workspace
Decorating your workspace or home office in a way you love is pretty powerful. It sets the intention that you’re ready to get some work done there. Sure, rolling over and grabbing your Macbook from the nightstand to knock some work out in bed sounds pretty convenient until you realize that you’ve been stuck in that same spot for days. Don’t do it, sis. Get some inspo to paint the wall, add some framed art or just spruce it up with fresh flowers – whatever you need to do so that you feel excited about your work environment. Make your workspace into something you’re proud of, and you won’t mind getting work done. If you need some inspiration for things to add to your office, check out my curated Amazon shop.
Stay on Task
It’s amazing what you can do if you buckle down and shut out distractions. Trust me, I know. I tell my husband that it takes me at least two hours to write a blog. Honestly, though – if you cut out the trips to the kitchen for snacks, the email reads and replies, and every flick of that thumb as I scrolled through Instagram, I probably spent less than an hour typing. Don’t get me wrong, taking breaks is fine – in fact, it’s necessary to avoid burn-out. But schedule your breaks into your day rather than taking them at a whim. Also, use a time-tracking app like Toggl as your productivity tool.
Thank me later.
People who work in an office get weekends off. While you may not be able to spare two whole days every week, set aside free time one day a week where you can rest and spend time with family or by yourself. Invest in yourself by practicing self-care. That might mean going to the spa or just laying in bed to read a book. Whatever “me-time” looks like to you – be sure to encourage it. Organizing your time is fine, but a little downtime can be therapeutic… even if you have to schedule it in!
Schedule Friend Time
Working at home is solitary in nature, but that doesn’t mean you have to neglect your social life. Studies have shown that well-connected people often live longer than those who are isolated. Make it a priority to reach out to someone every now and then via phone call or text and invite them to lunch or have a girls’ night.
You might even consider getting a friend to act as a motivational partner who can hold you accountable if you haven’t accomplished your business goals. Your “business bestie” can check in on you at regular intervals to see how you’re doing and to encourage you if needed. Tell this person what your intentions are so that she can check on your progress.
Working from home is a lifestyle change, so these tips will help take some of the stress out of your days and make the transition to working from home go much more smoothly.